Labor Day Special: Regret in bulk $19.99 (supplies limited limit one per customer not valid in AK and HI and DE)

I tell you this, that regret comes in great gallon-sized industrial vats like mayonnaise for church camp. That people who say they have no regrets are the same people who say they never fart in public. REGRET comes in different flavors too, lemonberry zing and white tea ginger peach and roast beef. All those at once, sometimes. REGRET for sale and you buy it - I've seen you! It's on a high shelf, one of those Costco "please ask for assistance" shelves but somehow it winds up in your shopping cart every Thursday when you've stopped for only a variety pack of potato chips for your kid's school picnic. Last minute like- there it is- REGRET next to the little cheap Made in China sandals you had to have and the wheel of Brie that will probably go bad in the back of the refrigerator. Right next to the Ivory soap and the Lucky Charms. REGRET that makes a racket when you heft it out of the cart onto the conveyer belt. The cashier's raised eyebrow and no eye contact. It's on sale? Tell the people behind you you'll be right back as you skim over the cement floors for another jar.